What am I doing?

There are times that I look at my life and I wonder "what the heck am I doing" and "how did I get into this mess?"  The house is littered with toys.  The yard is littered with toys.  The sink is filled with dishes.  The laundry is reproducing at an incredible rate.  The car is full of "stuff"- all kinds of stuff, and I rarely get a quiet moment to myself, let alone a shower.

Then I have a moment like this:

It was an early-release Wednesday.  I picked up the girls from school and we drove out to the produce stand at Parkesdale Farms to enjoy fresh strawberry parfaits, with fresh-from-the-fields strawberries.  Heavenly!!!!  I sat at the picnic table with my four kids dripping strawberry juice and ice cream on themselves and giggling.  I couldn't help but smile, the "I'm so incredibly happy" kind of smile.  I saw so much more than strawberry-ridden children.  I saw what Heavenly Father wanted me to see, four of His precious children in my care.  Here in our family to bless our lives in so many ways.  I saw the smiles of children who are safe and happy, who don't know hunger, who don't really know pain.  Yes, we have been without a husband and a father for months now.  Yes, it has been difficult.  But we have been so blessed!  I am so thankful for moments like these where I get a glimpse of the big picture, even if its just for one afternoon before I re-enter the "what's for dinner, Mom?" trenches.  Anyway, I'll take it!!  I'll gladly take the hand I've been dealt....  This really is what its all about.